Sunday, May 20, 2007
Yes or no
Well, ovulation has occured this cycle. Now the waiting game of did it work or didn't it...
Wednesday, May 9, 2007
Is it hot in here?
I am on day 6 of my cycle which is my second day of Clomid and I am having the fun side effect of hot flashes like mad. I am not looking forward to menopause! I didn't have any side effects last month but this time I am not so lucky. Whew!
Friday, May 4, 2007
Onto cycle 11
Well, the Clomid didn't work for us this cycle. I was so sure it would. I am disappointed beyond words. I had a negative pregnancy test when I was 2 days late and was going to try again when I was 5 days late but the answer came on day 4. I took another test anyway but, of course, it was negative. Poor overly positive Paul, he was so sure that this was it too. He even had a dream that I was pregnant. I have to hand it to him, he bounces right back with, "better luck next month, the trying is the funnest part." I, on the other hand, have been moping all day.
I wanted to give my mom the best mother's day present- grandmotherhood. I haven't even told my parents that we are trying because I wanted it to be a complete surprise when we got pregnant. I know they can't wait for me to have kids. But now with our apparent problems and the failure of the first round of medication, I think I need to tell them what's going on. Not only so that they aren't out of the loop but also for their support. I am really worried now that the Clomid may not do the trick. I need my mommy.
I wanted to give my mom the best mother's day present- grandmotherhood. I haven't even told my parents that we are trying because I wanted it to be a complete surprise when we got pregnant. I know they can't wait for me to have kids. But now with our apparent problems and the failure of the first round of medication, I think I need to tell them what's going on. Not only so that they aren't out of the loop but also for their support. I am really worried now that the Clomid may not do the trick. I need my mommy.
Wednesday, May 2, 2007
10 cycles and still trying...
I know that I am not the first person to have difficulty trying to get pregnant and I certainly won't be the last. I know that this story has been told a thousand times over but this time it's my story. I come from a strong and persistent mother who fought like heck to have me and was unable to have any more children. Now it seems that I am destined to continue her fight but hope to God that I can find the strength.
My last pill was on August 9, 2006. After years of procrastination, we threw out the pack mid-cycle. The usual "let's first finish this project, pay this off, save more money, etc" excuse list that can carry on for a lifetime had grown lame. We just found out my sister-in-law was pregnant and my husband thought it would be great to have cousins close in age. I said, "sure!" to my surprise and into the garbage the pills went.
At first it seemed fun but after many cycles went by, the waiting really got to me. I admit, I am not at all patient. When I want something, I want it NOW. 9 months already seems like long enough to wait! Finally, my primary care doctor agreed to refer me to a reproductive endocrinologist to see what the problem was.
I met with my fertility doctor for the first time on March 20, 2007 and I just loved her from the start. She was very straightforward and seemed quite proactive. She ordered a battery of tests. First, we did a sonohystogram which is an ultrasound procedure to visualize the inside of the uterus and endometrium. She put a catheter in my cervix and inflated a small balloon to hold it in place. Then she injected saline into the uterus and watched on the ultrasound as the saline moved through my fallopian tubes to make sure that there weren't any blockages. She also looked at my ovaries for cysts or abnormalities. Everything looked good so that was a relief since my mom suffered so bad from endometriosis and uterine fibroids. The procedure caused a lot of cramping but it subsided shortly after it was done. I also did a bunch of blood tests including a Clomid challenge test where she checked my follicle stimulating hormone, lutenizing hormone, and estradiol on day 3 of my cycle, then I took 100mg of Clomid on days 5-9 then she checked my levels of follicle stimulating hormone again on day 10. (Clomid is a fertility drug that influences the way that the hormones required for ovulation interact and ultimately leads to the release of one or more mature eggs - ovulation.) The blood tests showed that I have a hormone imbalance which is quite similar to Polycystic Ovary Syndrome but doesn't quite meet the requirements for diagnosis. Anyway, the hormone imbalance could lead to me either not ovulating or not producing mature enough eggs for fertilization. The good news is that I responded quite well to the Clomid so there is hope.
My doctor also ordered a semen analysis on Paul which he was so not happy about. She said that he had a record number of swimmers, more than they had ever seen in their lab, but that 95% of them were abnormally shaped. The good news is that 20 million normal sperm are the minimum they feel are required for a shot at fertilization and with his high volume, he had 40 million normal sperm. However, she suggested he see a urologist because he may have a varicocele which is a dilated blood vessel that are overheating the sperm and causing them harm. This is apparently quite common and easy to fix. Again, he is not so happy about the prospect of seeing a urologist. I made him an appointment with his primary care doctor on May 23 to get the referral assuring him that if I become pregnant in the meantime, he doesn't have to go.
So from the tests, the action plan my doctor and I agreed on is for Paul to see a urologist and for me to continue trying Clomid for the next 3 months. We will then meet again and see if we need to move onto insemination. I am hoping that the Clomid works, not only because it means that I will be pregnant finally, but also because my insurance does not cover any fertility treatment besides diagnostic testing and has a $5000 cap on fertility medications. Isn't that nice? "Yes, we have determined you have a fertility problem, now too bad for you because we won't help you fix it!" My doctor said that when it comes to fertility-challenged couples (I hate the term infertility, it makes it sound like it's impossible) 1/3 of the time it's a problem with the woman, 1/3 of the time it's a problem with the man, and 1/3 of the time it's a problem with both. Apparently we fall in the last category with my pseudo-PCOS and Paul's teratozoospermia.
Meanwhile, my sister-in-law just gave birth to a healthy and happy little boy. I am so happy for her but at the same time cannot help my envy as she is already at the destination and I cannot seem to catch a train...
My last pill was on August 9, 2006. After years of procrastination, we threw out the pack mid-cycle. The usual "let's first finish this project, pay this off, save more money, etc" excuse list that can carry on for a lifetime had grown lame. We just found out my sister-in-law was pregnant and my husband thought it would be great to have cousins close in age. I said, "sure!" to my surprise and into the garbage the pills went.
At first it seemed fun but after many cycles went by, the waiting really got to me. I admit, I am not at all patient. When I want something, I want it NOW. 9 months already seems like long enough to wait! Finally, my primary care doctor agreed to refer me to a reproductive endocrinologist to see what the problem was.
I met with my fertility doctor for the first time on March 20, 2007 and I just loved her from the start. She was very straightforward and seemed quite proactive. She ordered a battery of tests. First, we did a sonohystogram which is an ultrasound procedure to visualize the inside of the uterus and endometrium. She put a catheter in my cervix and inflated a small balloon to hold it in place. Then she injected saline into the uterus and watched on the ultrasound as the saline moved through my fallopian tubes to make sure that there weren't any blockages. She also looked at my ovaries for cysts or abnormalities. Everything looked good so that was a relief since my mom suffered so bad from endometriosis and uterine fibroids. The procedure caused a lot of cramping but it subsided shortly after it was done. I also did a bunch of blood tests including a Clomid challenge test where she checked my follicle stimulating hormone, lutenizing hormone, and estradiol on day 3 of my cycle, then I took 100mg of Clomid on days 5-9 then she checked my levels of follicle stimulating hormone again on day 10. (Clomid is a fertility drug that influences the way that the hormones required for ovulation interact and ultimately leads to the release of one or more mature eggs - ovulation.) The blood tests showed that I have a hormone imbalance which is quite similar to Polycystic Ovary Syndrome but doesn't quite meet the requirements for diagnosis. Anyway, the hormone imbalance could lead to me either not ovulating or not producing mature enough eggs for fertilization. The good news is that I responded quite well to the Clomid so there is hope.
My doctor also ordered a semen analysis on Paul which he was so not happy about. She said that he had a record number of swimmers, more than they had ever seen in their lab, but that 95% of them were abnormally shaped. The good news is that 20 million normal sperm are the minimum they feel are required for a shot at fertilization and with his high volume, he had 40 million normal sperm. However, she suggested he see a urologist because he may have a varicocele which is a dilated blood vessel that are overheating the sperm and causing them harm. This is apparently quite common and easy to fix. Again, he is not so happy about the prospect of seeing a urologist. I made him an appointment with his primary care doctor on May 23 to get the referral assuring him that if I become pregnant in the meantime, he doesn't have to go.
So from the tests, the action plan my doctor and I agreed on is for Paul to see a urologist and for me to continue trying Clomid for the next 3 months. We will then meet again and see if we need to move onto insemination. I am hoping that the Clomid works, not only because it means that I will be pregnant finally, but also because my insurance does not cover any fertility treatment besides diagnostic testing and has a $5000 cap on fertility medications. Isn't that nice? "Yes, we have determined you have a fertility problem, now too bad for you because we won't help you fix it!" My doctor said that when it comes to fertility-challenged couples (I hate the term infertility, it makes it sound like it's impossible) 1/3 of the time it's a problem with the woman, 1/3 of the time it's a problem with the man, and 1/3 of the time it's a problem with both. Apparently we fall in the last category with my pseudo-PCOS and Paul's teratozoospermia.
Meanwhile, my sister-in-law just gave birth to a healthy and happy little boy. I am so happy for her but at the same time cannot help my envy as she is already at the destination and I cannot seem to catch a train...
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